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Talk about a loaded theme that no one wants to talk about, that’s it. Amusing thing, extramarital affairs have been going on ever since millennium. Affairs can be burdened with problems, cause misery, and other problems. In addition you have to wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and frankness issue, money, age difference, spiritual background, shame, and on and on. I anticipate there will be some strong opinions about some of this.

For the intention of this article I will classify an affair as a long term, maybe months long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other persons, date married.

Why do men have extramarital affairs? There are as many answers as there are women seeking affairs. I am conserned generally though it is just the human state, the need for liking, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and loved. Here are a several explanations I have run across.

Naturally we as human beings are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasant and exciting, and sex makes us flee the real world for a short period of time. This euphoria exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels elevated enough. Some people are able to switch the longing on and off, some are excellent at controlling it and others are so-so at best. Though we all have it, young and old, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the chase. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another human being, for some it is the longing to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the total romance thing. These needs and yearnings can be so strong they prevail over the taboos society has erected against affairs. For many people the yearnings will defeat their worries and make them risk the anger of not only their relatives, but the public too. So why, what is the catalyst?

Sex Addicts, probably some of us are. Sex is awfully good, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically obsessed sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not injure your relatives or anyone else? You will need to reduce the jeopardy you are taking. If you have the attitude that a good affair is one that is advantageous to all, then good luck.

No love at home, or no romance. I suppose this is the major group, enormous really. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, apart from they feel comfy in the manner they live, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Also there are the children to think about. Your money are so entangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to be together besides love and sex.

Bodily reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them implementing the sex performance, at least not with their spouse. An extra-marital affair occasionally solves the trouble while keeping the marriage intact.

Avoidance, sadly this is a regular groung I fear. One or the other, usually the guy is sexually neglecting his wife for a number of reasons. As a man I actually am grateful to you guys neglecting your ladies and making them accessible to us males of romance, making them “hot wives” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but evil.

Something is just missing in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Maybe its romance that is missing, maybe it is a lack of love, could be caring is gone, maybe it is the closeness, maybe neglect. Could be we have simply developed distantly, our general concerns diverged. Could be it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my ages, is contradictory of what you want. Maybe I simply do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Could be, just maybe I miss that sensation that when I am with you, it just feels right.

The major reason people give is, they seek the passion that is missing and so very much longed for.

There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to run away, for economic gain, for vengeance and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.